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My vacation couldn’t have came at a better time + mini update

My husband and I finally booked a couple paid days off added to our normal two days off that started yesterday. With my mental health suffering more so than it has in a long time, so much has caused me to not even write much anymore it was way over do. I am surprised we waiting until May to do the mini-vacay because our vacation time reset last March actually. What made it even more better timing was last Thursday we received a 1700 piece Grocery truck (larger than our average big trucks) that we had to stock and still manage to condition the shelves with two of our top workers off on vacation that night. By some miracle our team rallied together and got out at 6:34 am, only 4 minutes of over time. However, my mental health and body paid the price. I was an anxious wreck and beyond sore like crippling sore for the remaining 3 nights of work. We also have some of our top workers going on leave and losing one for other reasons next month. Meaning I will be the only top worker(and I am not the best believe me lol) left with a bunch of cry babies or slow workers left with no one applying because unemployment lazy fucks. Meaning I needed to take my vacation now or never before I have to dig deep and work even harder than I am use to for a month or so. So yes this vacation could have not come at a better time. I plan to get plenty of over do needed down time and sort out my shit during these 4 nights off.

Our one and only thing we need to do on our 4 days off is get into a new vehicle, because our Chevi Cruze has been running like shit for over a year now and is at risk of breaking down again at any given time. We are tired of making payments on a car that is a piece of shit and will cost thousands of dollars to repair. We went to the same pre-owned dealership we got our current chevi cruze from yesterday and looked at our options and they are starting the process of getting us into an affordable vehicle that we want. We really wanted the Chevi Equinox, but it is looking like the down payment may be a bit out of our price range as well as the monthly payment. We did not really plan or save for getting into another vehicle, which is making our options a little more limited than we want. However, getting into anything with not too many miles or problems etc is better than what we have right now. I am thinking we will probably be looking into something more like the Chevi Malibu, which is a bit bigger than the car we have right now. As much as we want to get into an SUV that is not The Chevi Trax, because the Trax has horrible reviews and the same transmission/motor we have issues with in our current car, as well as it is a very small SUV, it just may be a bit more pricier than we want right now. We will see, we will hear back today from the dealership who will give us our options of what suitable vehicle we can get into. I really hope it gets sorted out soon because honestly with how anxious I have been, this new car thing is becoming a inconvenience to my vacation that I took so I can decomprise and get much needed me time. That even if we can get into something like The Malibu, we can drive it for a year or two, make extra payments on it and then trade it in for an SUV in the near future.

In other news, they are building a store from the same company we work for up north and my husband and I are thinking about buying property there and transferring to the new store once it is built. Not only do my husband and I want to live in the middle of butt fuck no where away from all the idiots in the city and I grew up in a very remote place, but property is much cheaper as there are less jobs, it is not the city etc so no one wants to really live there besides retired people and a few other folks who already have jobs and are not city people. It is also a lot closer to my husband’s dad as he lives up North now and we rarely see him because it is a three hour drive from where we live right now etc. So it is not a for sure or nothing has been finalized, but an idea and something we are really considering. If the transfer is possible, it will most likely happen as there are no doubts in mine or my husband’s mind about wanting to relocate more north and away from the busy city.

Trivium is coming to Michigan along with Megadeth and Lamb Of God in September. I really want to surprise the hubby with tickets, but not sure how to surprise him without him realizing a couple hundreds of dollars went mysteriously missing out of the bank account. Any ideas? xD Either way I got to do it soon if we want good seats, as they sell out fast.

Alright that’s all from me for now. 🙂

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This is a quick video of one of the shittiest times with our kittens! <3 :(

Here is another older video I shared on youtube of our little fur baby Apollo trying to maneuver his new cone after being neutered. If you are an animal lover, owner or thinking about getting pets especially a puppy or kitten, you may find the tips I shared in the description helpful. They are all tips I wish I looked into or learned before our kittens spay/neuter and hernia surgery.

The tips I shared in the description:

A great tip to help a cat or dog become use to the cone and be less stressed about having to use one is to get them use to it before they go into surgery. Just let them have it on for 5-10 mins at a time and reward them with a treat for good behavior. We did reward them with treats for good behavior with the cones after we brought them home from surgery, but we made the mistake of not getting them use to the cones before the surgery and I think that distressed them more than we would have liked.

We bought the cones that were much shorter than the cones that the veterinarian clinic offered to hopefully help our kittens maneuver in them better. Especially Mika who is a much smaller kitten/cat as she is/was the runt of her litter. You may not need shorter or smaller cones. We bought them for very cheap at Pet Supplies, the same store we buy all their food and some other needs.

You can feed your cat or dog some wet food or food by a spoon while they have their cones on so they find it easier to eat and make less of a mess. My husband and I personally just took their cones off to feed them and if they started to lick/scratch at their stitches etc, we would put the cone or cones back on them.

It is very important to still let a cat groom themselves when they are in the healing process after surgery. We allowed our kittens to have their cones off for 5-10 mins after eating and before bed time to groom themselves. We kept them from licking or scratching their stitches, and if they didn’t listen or kept wanting to lick/scratch at their sensitive areas, we would put the cone back on immediately.

When your cat or cats come back from the veternarian clinic, especially if they had an intensive surgery done they will smell like the vet. If you have more than one cat, they will not recognize each other’s scent anymore. As you know, a cat’s scent is how they know each other. The smell from the veternarian clinic, mixed with the drugs they were given for the surgery and/or surgeries etc..and stress of the whole situation pets, may hiss and be very skeptical of each other when brought home. Our kittens took two days if not more to realize they are brother and sister. They didn’t want to be around each other for the first couple days and if one went near the other one in the slightest they would hiss at each other. I was so very confused of this behavior at first, thought maybe Mika was just really uncomfortable and didn’t want to be bothered by Apollo. I found out it had more to do with the whole situation and the different of scents. Don’t worry they became best buds again after those couple days of little cat fights.

It is best to separate pets after surgery if you have more than one to reduce things like play or scratching each other that can rip the stitches. Etc.

PS: Ignore my husband’s commentary or possible offensive language in the background as he was on mic playing xbox with his buddies. Lol

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30 Days Of Autism Acceptance ~ 15

Please head over to the original post and check it out!

Autie J -30 Days of Autism Acceptance 2021

 

Rules: Answer the prompt of the day on your own separate post. You can answer as many or as few of these as you like. Answer with as much or as little detail as you wish. Some questions this year have an alternative option that you can do if you prefer. You can answer just one or both of them. And make sure to tag it as #30daysofautismacceptance and #2021. And feel free to do this on any other social media platform that you want as well. Please help me spread this before the start of April!

Autie J

April 15th: Do you work? If so, what is that like for you? Are you open about being autistic at work? Alternatively, how open are you about being autistic? Do you tell a lot of people? Or just a select few? How do people normally react when you tell them? If you don’t tell people, then why?

I work at a huge retail company, but not Wal-Mart. Lolll. I use to work 30-40 hours a week on days depending on the week as a Grocery Inventory Coordinator. It was a social nightmare for me and the amount of responsibility in that position also tested my sanity to no end, but it was the first job I got hired at as an immigrant in the USA once my immigration stuff was complete and I received my green card. I figured why not get my foot in the door anywhere and see what happens? I loved parts of being a Grocery IC, I took a lot of pride of the position and being responsible for so much, but because the social anxiety from customers became too overwhelming, I switched to Grocery Night Stock as soon as the opportunity arose after having many frustrating meetings with the Human Resource manager including ending up in her office from being in tears because I was just so overwhelmed on days. Trust me it was not for lack of trying or me giving up, I just wanted a shift that was better suited for me. Although night shift comes with plenty of over time, meaning more than 40 hours or more hours than I would prefer, it is much more quiet on nights with customers even outside of the pandemic of us not being closed like we are for the majority of my shift right now. Also it is literally just stock the truck and then condition the shelves (make it look prettyyy!!!) so the focus of tasks on nights is much more easier even though that is not our only job, cause duh it’s retail. Our Grocery night stock team’s is also responsible to bail out the store as well countless of nights, but with it being so quiet I don’t lose focus from distractions etc and you do have more time to get things done. Also because our store manager also knows how much we help out other departments and get a ton of shit done on a nightly basis, he normally gives us priority of hours a lot of the time so we have more staff on our team. Although when I first went to nights there was literally like 3 people and 4 people on weekends excluding management, and at times I did get overwhelmed, but it was never the same as days. Knowing I survived the nightmare when I went to nights, I know this is the shift for me. I also take pride in my job at night and my managers count on me a lot which means a lot. I am overall happy with my job right now and it is basically the same routine every week, same shifts start, we normally do get off at 6:30 am or close outside of holidays or if we are ever low on staff etc…and I have the same two days off minus the odd time my days may be changed around but it is very rare and my managers do their best to prepare us for the schedule change in advance. Like that it works for now. Rather I will change career paths or make this my career as after being there for 3 years etc I know what to expect, it pays the bills and I do have job security, benefits etc.

Due to bad experiences of telling people I am on the Autism Spectrum, or not wanting to be treated differently from my coworkers or at work and regardless of all my diagnosis, I do my best to hold myself to the same expectations as everyone else not to mention that is really what equality is….I haven’t told many of my coworkers or my peers at work I am Autistic. A few of my close coworkers know and I have brought it up with The Human Resource manager before and it is on my file…but like I don’t go around making it public. I haven’t shared it with my managers on a personal level, but they know on a need to know basis because it is in my file etc.

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30 Days Of Autism Acceptance ~ 14

Please head over and check out the original post and the author. 🙂

Autie J -30 Days of Autism Acceptance 2021

Rules: Answer the prompt of the day on your own separate post. You can answer as many or as few of these as you like. Answer with as much or as little detail as you wish. Some questions this year have an alternative option that you can do if you prefer. You can answer just one or both of them. And make sure to tag it as #30daysofautismacceptance and #2021. And feel free to do this on any other social media platform that you want as well. Please help me spread this before the start of April!

Autie J

April 14th: What do you like about being autistic?

1 ~ I appreciate the little things.

While neurotypicals like to engage in shallow conversations, I would rather go for a walk and notice the breeze in my hair or listen to the birds chirping. I love spending time alone as it gives me time to truly enjoy the small things around me that not everyone may notice.

2~ I am honest.

Dishonesty is not in my way of thinking, nor is over exaggerating something. Also because I struggle with displaying emotion when you ask my opinion on something or ask me something I will give you my straight up answer with no bull shit. Rather it is something you want to hear or not. 🙂

3~ I am very creative

Rather my OCD or just my autism plays apart in my love for creativity, it has given me a true love and passion for things like writing, creative thinking, scrap booking and other creative things I enjoy.

4~ I am pretty sure my autism and also my OCD also is the reason for my strong passion for music.

I am not entirely sure where this comes from so maybe this is not entirely related, but I have a strong relationship with music. More so than most people I know including my friends, peers etc. I can literally lye on my bed with a headset on and listen to a great album from start to finish and endulge myself in it. It is like heaven to me and better than doing any kind of drugs. 🙂 I appreciate all genres of music and it has done more for me than just be simply therapeutic.

5 ~ I focus on the small details while others around me are frustrated by this.

The hyper focus of children on the autism spectrum can at first seem be a problem, but in reality it is truly helpful in adulthood. As we make our way into the world our attention to detail can lead to many amazing opportunities such as works in mathematics, cyber security, engineering, research and development and so much more.

6~ I live in a black and white world.

I am an open book and nothing can change my mind. If I love something, I truly love it and if I hate something there is nothing anyone or anything can do to change it.

7 ~ I am very passionate about the things that interest me.

When something interests me, I will learn everything there is to know about it. It is another common feature shared by many on the autism spectrum that allows us to be extremely intelligent regardless of what society tells you.

8 ~ I don’t judge anyone.

Mainly because I fail to pick up on the social expectations of society. I also don’t really hold myself to society standards when it comes to upholding a certain image, so why would I judge others? As long as you are kind and good hearted person we will get along. 🙂 I would rather spend time on getting to know the real you than be distracted by stupid things like a bad hair day, lack of make up or how much money you have in your wallet or whatever it may be. I especially do not judge those with disabilities because I personally know what it is like to be excluded for my differences and it fucking sucks.

9 ~ I love being alone.

While most people in society cannot go two seconds without checking their facebook status, phone or getting hung up in small chit chat, I can spend hours alone and be completely content. I use my alone time to get creative juices flowing, to unwind from a busy work shift or what have you. Many of my favorite memories are times I spent by myself either listening to music, writing or enjoying nature etc. Being alone is not lonely to me and it does not equal to my depression. If that makes any sense. I also enjoy the time I do spend with my husband, family, friends etc and being social is still important, but it is also very important to be okay to be alone.

10 ~ I love my routine.

My need for routine has always made me extremely punctual, in fact more punctual than most. It has helped me get things done etc.

Alright that is just a small list of things I love about being Autistic. 🙂

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30 Days Of Autism Acceptance ~ 8~13

Here are my answers for 30 Days Of Autism Acceptance from days 8 through 13. What multiple answers in one post?!?! Yup I was late again, sorry guys, but I had an exhausting and extremely hectic week at work with plenty of over time etc.

Here is the link to the original author of this post:

Autie J -30 Days of Autism Acceptance 2021

Rules: Answer the prompt of the day on your own separate post. You can answer as many or as few of these as you like. Answer with as much or as little detail as you wish. Some questions this year have an alternative option that you can do if you prefer. You can answer just one or both of them. And make sure to tag it as #30daysofautismacceptance and #2021. And feel free to do this on any other social media platform that you want as well. Please help me spread this before the start of April!

Autie J

April 8th: Talk about friendship. How important are friends to you? Do you find it hard to make and maintain friendships? Are your friends generally supportive? Is there anything about having friends that confuses you?

Growing up on the autism spectrum there was always challenges especially communication ones when it came to making friends. As a kid, I had tons of friends you could say that I would play outside in the neighborhood just about everyday after school and homework. Most of them were mutual friends through my brother or just living in the same small neighborhood. I only had three really close friends named Emma, Leyna and Ali. Ali was my first best friend until she moved away after a few years of forming our close bond. Then I also moved not long after that across Canada to British Columbia, I only ever had two very close friends, and not many outside of that besides mutual friends again through my brother. I never seeked out friends or wanted to go to public places outside of school to meet new people. I was horrible in social situations, especially crowds. I was also bullied a lot more so than other kids because of my autism differences. At times it was even challenging to tell if people liked me or not. I dunno…I also had periods in my life with no friends and was completely content.

Much like my marriage or past relationships I needed friends who would be understanding of my needs and or differences. My close friends understood I got really socially overwhelmed, especially from school and would understand why I couldn’t hang out after school as often as other children or teens loved to do. All my close friends also had similar interests than me and that was really important.

I currently have no close friends since I moved to the USA with my husband. The only people I hang out with once in awhile are his friends and their kids or what have you, but it is not something that bothers me. I am completely happy with doing my own thing.

April 9th: How has the pandemic impacted you? Has it changed routines? Do you like or dislike masks? What do you wish allistics and neurotypicals knew/understood about how the pandemic is impacting autistic people?

As an autistic individual, spending time alone and finding my own entertainment is something I am completely use too. My husband and I both had to work during the pandemic, so we did get to get out of the house so maybe it was not as bad as for some other people who were really affected by the pandemic. I actually loved the fact people had to stay at least six feet away from me at all times because I always hated most people being in my personal bubble. I am also not a super affectionate person with people besides my husband and maybe family, so I didn’t miss things like hugging people etc. As for going out to crowded places like restaurants, movie theaters and what not, I don’t normally do this outside of the pandemic as it is very hard for me to function in crowded places, so that didn’t bother me so much either. So though I think like everyone was affected by the pandemic, I don’t think it had that much of impact on me than most. It frustrates me that so many neurotypicals are still sitting on unemployment when we have been out of lock down for months when a person like me who is autistic and a major germ-a-phobe worked during the entire pandemic, including lock downs. So I guess I wish they knew that but that makes me sound like a complete heartless bitch tbh. But hey….It is affecting my work hugely as no one is applying for jobs and we are extremely short staffed which also btw ramps up my anxiety at work and causes me to be even more overwhelmed. So I am kinda just over the excuses. The government is ruining America tbh, as if today’s society wasn’t lazy enough. >.> What I also wish neurotypicals knew is that they are spoiled little social brats and that is what raised our numbers. People having Thanksgiving get togethers in the middle of a pandemic, Covid parties and such was a joke to me and not only reminded me of the stupidity in society, but also our pure selfishness. During the pandemic they could have learned a lot from the autistic community as we do practice social distance every day, and most have experienced years of being lonely due to being bullied or the lack of communication skills and social anxiety. I won’t explain any further as I wrote a blog on this entire topic that is not as bitchy sounding as this answer. Check it out here if you wish to know more: https://myauthenticmind88.wordpress.com/2020/04/21/if-there-was-ever-a-time-to-be-autistic/

April 10th: How important is representation to you? Is the representation that is out there generally good or bad? What is your favorite piece of representation? What you like to see more of in autism representation? What would you like to see less of?

Autism representation is very important to me, but however it has to be the right kind of representation. Examples of this include our own autistic voices and the autism community. Though there has been extremely good and educated studies on autism and the professionals do represent us for the most part, not including the few bad ones, it is us who should always have the first say on us. You can study and understand to extreme lengths of autism, but you will never understand or experience it more than a person living with it.

I am tired of neurotypicals playing autistic role in shows or films as for the most part it really represents us in a negative way in the media or society. If they can represent an autistic role than we can equally play a neurotypical role. I am sick of parents of autistic children speaking about them as if they are not in the room or acting like autism is a death sentence or treat it like it is some kind of a disease. In fact the parents who do act like this boils my blood to no end. What pisses me off more than even lack of understand parents is cure-alls or people who still believe vaccines cause autism. Societies view on autistics because of the bad representation also makes me want to throw up in my mouth. 🙂

So there is good and bad when it comes to autism representation, but like I explained it depends on the source of representation and it is up to us as an autistic community to end the bad representation.

April 11th: What are your thoughts/feelings about masking (a term for when autistic people hide their autistic traits)? Do you mask?

I wrote an entire blog post about this exact subject. Please do check it out if you haven’t yet as I very much enjoyed writing it and put a lot of work into it.

ffhttps://myauthenticmind88.wordpress.com/2018/02/04/passing-as-normal-neurotypical-is-it-worth-it

April 12th: Is there anything you find hard to do because of being autistic? Is there anything that you find easy?

Like any human being I have strengths and weaknesses. Tired of society pretending neurotypicals never struggle with anything and they are so perfect. Yeah that is all I have to say about that. 🙂

April 13th: How much preparation and planning do you need before doing new things, or even for familiar things? Do you need to be totally prepared ahead of time or are you more comfortable with being spontaneous/just going for it? Does it vary for you depending on the thing or the day?

I am an extremely routine person and I always have been. Even as a child my parents had to stick to a strict routine and if anything came up unplanned they had to prepare me for it days in advance and explain in complete detail of what it is I will be doing or taking part in. I hate last minute changes to my routine or new things. In fact, without my routine I don’t function and causes me to become more overwhelmed than normal. So yes I need plenty of time to prepare for new things or changing in my normal schedule. Though most human beings are very routine, it is very extreme for most of us on the spectrum.

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30 Days Of Autism Acceptance ~ Day 7

Please head over to the original post and check it out or feel free to participate yourself!

Autie J -30 Days of Autism Acceptance 2021

Rules: Answer the prompt of the day on your own separate post. You can answer as many or as few of these as you like. Answer with as much or as little detail as you wish. Some questions this year have an alternative option that you can do if you prefer. You can answer just one or both of them. And make sure to tag it as #30daysofautismacceptance and #2021. And feel free to do this on any other social media platform that you want as well. Please help me spread this before the start of April!

Autie-J(Tumblr)

April 7th: How are you with sarcasm and/or metaphors/figures of speech? Do you interpret things very literally?

I have explained this in my post ‘Growing up with Undiagnosed Autism,’ but will touch on it lightly again. 🙂 If you would like to check out that post you can read it here: https://myauthenticmind88.wordpress.com/2018/01/24/old-post-growing-up-with-undiagnosed-autism/?preview_id=178&preview_nonce=53c93aecda&preview=true

Sarcasm was probably one of my most challenging things to grasp growing up. For a long time it was quite a loss for me and something that went way over my head. I would take sarcasm very literally even if it was a sarcastic comment my close friends or family members made and I would be very offended by such comments. It caused feelings to get hurt and sometimes unnecessary arguments. Luckily I had a brother who helped toughen me up and a very sarcastic grandma(my dad’s mom…we call her ‘nanny’) which eventually helped me understand sarcasm eventually. Even as a person who loves to write metaphors was another thing I took very literally. Which at times made English class a nightmare and sometimes even effected my grades even though I normally aced English class. With the help of my peers, brother, friends etc and my personal experiences I am now happy to say I do understand all of the above, but it was not something that came natural to me.

Alright guys that’s it for today. Stay tuned for more!